Whattup Horsey-holics !!! And welcome to the Official stompin grounds of the “Yard Bird Posse”. This is of course your “Certified” Cult Leader and I have a few things I wanna get off my chest.

First off, I want to OFFICIALLY announce that Fire and Ice Wrestling has New Tag-Team Champions. They are none other than “The Other White Meat” Dale Johnson and “The Orient Express” Shank Dorsey. Why do I say that I am OFFICIALLY announcing this? Simple.

The team collectively known as Shank and Dale won the Tag Titles this past Saturday in Zanesville, OH and still I have not heard mention of it anywhere on the FIW Website and especially on the hotlines (614-470-1700). It seems that “Self” Mark Stone and Fat Dick has conveniently forgotten to mention one the greatest accomplishments of Shank and Dale thus far. I mean, we walked into Fire and Ice Wrestling, A Promotion that is said by many to have one of the best rosters in Ohio, and in our very FIRST match as a Tag-Team; We walk away with the Gold. And in a pretty impressive fashion too I might add. How many other Tag-Teams can say that. Not “The Dynasty”. Not “The FIW Cliq”. No one that I can think of can honestly say that they have made an impact on FIW like Shank and Dale has. But do they get the credit they deserve……..NO……..AND WHY?

Is it because we are different? Is it because we come across a little shady at times? Oh what, you suck one dick and you’re a fag right? I would like to know why we are being overlooked by FIW. I guess it must have pissed you off pretty bad to see us walk away with those titles huh fellas. I just want to know who we have to hurt to get some recognition around this place.

Stone, did it conveniently slip your mind because we won’t do the things you want us to do or was it because you were too busy with Rip Malibu’s “Yam Bag” down your throat thus causing the eh-hem “sore throat”.

And Fat Dick, speaking of swinging on some nuts and smoochin the balloon knots. I guess if you’re not Country, The Dynasty, or The FIW Cliq then your not worth mentioning, right? Every time I listen to your hotline report, those are the only names I hear?

Well, listen good; The both of you. You better watch who you ignore or it will come up and bite you both in your Big Fat Asses. Stone, we have a past. We have a History. Again I ask you. How many people do you think would pay to see Shank Dorsey VS. Mark Stone inside a Steel Cage? You may have been able to get rid of my “Inside Guy”, if indeed, he was the “Inside Guy” but you cannot get rid of Shank and Dale. Why you ask?

Simply because Shank and Dale sell tickets and now that the T.V. show has begun, Shank and Dale equals Ratings. You know that to be true and since your number one concern is money, you are not going to jeopardize that.

And Fat Dick. This is a word of advice for you. I am not Big White and I will not wrestle you in a pool of Jell-o. I am “The Orient Express” Shank Dorsey and I will wait for you in the shadows and leave you lying in a pool of your own blood. We will not be denied.

Enough of you two Jackoffs, and speaking of Jackoffs, let me mention to you that “The Other White Meat” Dale Johnson is currently getting his Big Poppa Pump on with some Big Nosed, white picket fence livin, Horsey-holic that will remain nameless because honestly, his name is not worth me remembering anyway. I too, believe it or not, am thinking of getting my pump on. We’ll just have to see. According to my partner, the big nose gal lute is a pretty sad trainer anyway. If I remember correctly, Dale said something to the extent of “He doesn’t have anything for me” and he is just selling being sore to make “Gonzo” feel good about himself because he realizes that money doesn’t buy happiness. Those may not be exact quotes but it was something to that extent.

Anyway, I just wanted to get that off my chest and now I feel better. So as I finish this week, or month, whichever way you’d like to think. I want to send out a “Yard Bird Posse” congrads to Alouiscious boothodomy dammed on the birth of his 7-pound baby boy, which is named Jonathan Camry. We will just call him A.J., which is short for Al B. Jr., and are officially making him an honorary “Yard Bird” member.

So till next time Horsey-holics, just remember “If you ain’t “Yard Bird”, you ain’t shit”